I don’t know where the Israeli Army Diet originated. Unsurprisingly, this diet has nothing to do with The Israeli Army, that was just the name that was slapped on it in the 70s to give it some credibility. (Much like the Mayo Clinic Diet, the Sacred Heart Diet (named after a hospital in Canada that had nothing to do with it), and others.) How dumb are we as a species? If we saw this diet:

Breakfast: A meatball
Lunch: Huckleberry cobbler
Dinner: A rock

We’d be like, “That’s absurd.” But if we saw this diet:

The Salvation Army Marching Band Diet
Breakfast: A meatball
Lunch: Huckleberry cobbler
Dinner: A rock

We’d be like, “Well, that seems worth a shot.”

But since I don’t know the origin of the diet, I don’t really know what it means when it says that for the fifth and sixth day I can have “chicken.” Can I fry it? Can I stuff it with swiss cheese and ham? Can I bread it and parm it and put it in a sandwich? I’m guessing no. I know how these types of diets work, so I know it means chicken cooked in only the most boring, undelicious ways possible. Well, I picked up a roast chicken at the grocery store yesterday and have been living off that for these two days. To be honest, it’s not that bad. It’s a significant step up from the apples and cheese days, at least. I think I’m going to be overwhelmed when I go back to having more than a single option as far as what to eat each day. But I’m looking forward to it.